Parenting 101

Parenting forms the foundation of any child’s behaviour. Although the debate between nature and nurture determinants of behaviour remains open, it is my strong believe that nurture has the lion’s share. The environment a child grows in shapes their behaviour. This shows how much a parent/guardian should be careful with their parenting style. I was brought up by typical african parents who instictively parented us, “tough love” kind of upringing and I have to give them credit for the good job they did.
There are various types of parenting styles but I will look into three distictive styles.
The fisrt one is the permisive parenting style where the parent gives their children the freedom to do almost anything they want to do. They may pamper the child “kababa” and “kamama” kind of love or be unavailable in the children’s life. The children have more control over their lives and make most of the decisions like when and who to go play with. The problem is that the excess freedom given to them can be the same tool that destroys them. They often feel unwanted and uncared for. They may end up in unwanted behaviours like drugs and crime.
The second type is the authoritarian kind of parents who are the strict kind of parents ‘yes sir’ ‘yes madam’ parent. They have a closer watch on their children actions. Making all the decisions like where to go to school what to eat and put on. They do well in developing obedient children but the children have troubles expressing their views and decision making.
The third kind is the authoritative ones who give their children freedom but with limits. Telling them to express themselves but only to a certain point. In such a home the children can decide what school they would want to go to but wait for their parents approval.
It is the duty of the parent/guardian to bring up their children in the modest way possible therefore, a balance between love and freedom is key. Notable observation is that the parenting styles may be informed by social classes and size of the family (One child family for example). Most parents heavily borrow from their own experiences while growing up but love surpasses all.